This latest blog entry seeks to address the issue of conflicts that arise between church members and the damage they can cause, not only to the individuals involved, but to the entire church body if they’re not handled properly and resolved. During my 44 years in pastoring, the biggest source of church conflicts were issues between individual church members. Rarely were these conflicts fueled by something doctrinal, most often they were powered by the personal dynamics between individual church members. Causes included: personalities that clashed, their unwillingness to filter the words that came out of their mouths, differences of opinions and attitudes, or that strange dynamic that some people just irritate us. It’s interesting to see a list of things that have actually stirred conflict between church members. Here are some examples: 1 - At the conclusion of the service, what side of the door should the pastor stand by in order to interact with with church members? 2 - Should there be a clock in the sanctuary or not? 3 - Should we call a church luncheon a “potluck” or a “pot blessing”? 4 - Should the bread used in communion be gluten-free or not? 5 - How many verses should be sung during the Invitation? These are not made up things, but actual conflicts that have arisen in church groups.

Let’s begin by saying that inside every believer, there exists a contradiction. As born-again believers, we are, in fact, new creations in Christ, yet we still carry within us, remnants of our old sinful-nature (some carry more than others). Our old nature still desires what pleases it, sometimes at the expense of others. James 4:1 says, “Where do wars and fights come from among you? Do they not come from your desires for pleasure that war in your members”. That’s quite a thought-provoking question, “What causes fights and quarrels among you”? James is referencing our self-indulgent cravings that put personal satisfaction above God’s will. You wouldn’t think that internal “wars” and “fights” would be something that churches would have to deal with, but we know that they do exist within church families. Let’s try a scenario here. Let’s suppose the church determines they need to build a fence around the church property. One option is a brick fence, a second option is a chain-link fence, a 3rd option is wooden fence, and a 4th option feels that a church should never be fenced in because we should be “open” to all. Everyone if firm in their preferences (and it’s important to understand that each option is a “preference”). You favor the 2nd option, but folks for the 3rd option make a good case and you’re kind of leaning to that choice, but then you realize that Bro. Bodecker likes that option and you don’t like Bro. Bodecker so you stick to your guns for option 2. Now the issue has evolved into a real skirmish and it not figured out, it can morph into a full-blown conflict - all because you don’t like Bro. Bodecker. Problems arise within a church because imperfect people haven’t figured out how to get along and work together.

True holiness may begin between God and the individual member, but it finds its full expression in community with other people - in particular our church family - other wonderful, glorious, frustrating, exasperating, and sometimes offensive people just like ourselves!

Around 50 times in the New Testament, Jesus and the apostles tell us to feel, say, or do something to “one another”. Some of which include; we are to care for one another, bear with one another, honor one another, sing to one another, do good to one another, and forgive one another. And there is the grand, overarching, most-repeated “one another”, the command that “binds everything together in perfect harmony” (Colossians 3:14) - “Love one another”. These “one-anothers” do not exhaust our obligations to other believers (many communal imperatives do not include the phrase “one another, but together they offer us a brilliant picture of life together under the lordship of Christ - and not only the under the lordship of Christ, but also in the pattern/example of Christ. For when we fully grasp them, these “one-anothers” are nothing less than the life of Christ at work in the people of Christ to the glory of Christ.

Consider, for example, how even in a community-oriented passage like Colossians 3:12 - 17 (which by the way includes 3 “one-anothers”), Paul can’t stop talking about Jesus. Our new character - compassionate, kind, humble, meek, patient (v12) - reflects the “image of its Creator (v10). We forgive “as the Lord has forgiven us” (v13). Our unity reflects “the peace of Christ” (v15); our words flow from the “word of Christ” (v16). In fact, whatever we do in community, we do “in the name of the Lord Jesus” (v17). For here, “Christ is all, and in all” (v11).